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Well Darlings,

Apologies for being later this week - I've been busy. Don't ask!

I see the Bat Conservation Trust will be visiting the Palace of Westminster, home of our parliament, this week to count the bats. I think they'll be busy too. A lot of batty things come out that place, don't they? I guess that could be why chiroptophobia has become so common in Britain. However I didn't realise that another phobia, coulrophobia, was that common until I read the theme for the "Bestival" event on the Isle of Wight in early September this year has had to be changed because so many people have expressed a fear. Perhaps I should have done - we're not short of clowns in this country, are we?

So how have you all been coping with the heatwave? Most of us appear to have enjoyed it, although it has been a little dangerous for the elderly and infirm. Certainly it has produced some gorgeous (in both the old and the may be becoming sense of the word - thank you Sir Ian!) eye candy on the streets of Blackpool - for which this old biddy remains eternally grateful! Nevertheless hot on the heels of the recent report that many of our ambulance services become overstretched during a heatwave comes the news that our fire-fighters are "stretched to breaking point" at these times.

The Fire Brigades Union blame cuts encouraged by the Government and pushed through by local authorities for this alarming situation which can put lives at risk. They say: "UK weather appears to be coming more extreme, varied and unpredictable and the fire and rescue services needs more fire crews," and that they barely have enough resources to cope with the normal number of emergencies, yet more cuts are planned.

Further cuts do seem a bit silly, don't they? But I guess it's all down to those clowns again - falling flat on their faces is one of their trademarks. It's little wonder we have such a fear of them, is it?

We have a well known clown here in Blackpool: Mooky. He's one that we all love and, unlike a lot of clowns these days, he is a great asset; a benefit to our town. Which brings me to the King of Clowns. With Blackpool putting so many hopes on winning the licence for the super-casino, I find all the recent revelations concerning John Prescott being associated with Philip Anschutz, owner of the Anschutz Entertainment Group which took over the running of the Millennium Dome in 2004, a little unnerving. They say there's no such thing as a free meal. Well what about a stay at an American tycoon's Colorado ranch? Does that come free? Or is there a price to pay? Anschutz has long been known to be wanting the government to allow a super-casino in the dome (now called O2) and since 2002 Mr Prescott has had no less than seven meetings with Mr Anschutz, with a further one planned - albeit delayed since all the media interest.

Of course, there could be nothing at all to the people's fears. It may all be above board and pure coincidence. Someone we've come to see as a buffoon, just being a buffoon and not thinking through the consequences of his actions. But with new evidence now emerging which contradicts the assertion by the Government that the Deputy Prime Minister has had "no role" in the government's policy on casinos, it's getting increasing harder to believe that.

Do you believe in coincidences? Could it just be a coincidence that Prescott has also visited the Sydney Star City Casino complex on "official business" in order to "get a feel for what an establishment of that size was like" accompanied by "a government relations officer", when we're told he has had "no role" in the government's policy on casinos? It's a big leap, isn't it? I haven't managed to get my legs that far apart for many a long year!

We're told Blackpool Council bosses will not be joining in the row over Prescott's meetings with the man who wants to build a mega casino in O2. I find that rather apathetic of them. If you really want something, then you should be prepared to go all out to get it. Thankfully there will be others who will be fighting our corner for us. Southend's demands for a full investigation will certainly help us. So too will the Conservative Party's demands.

Hugo Swire MP, the Shadow Secretary of State for Culture, Media & Sport, has said: "The Government must make a full statement to Parliament on the precise role of John Prescott over casinos. It is clear that Prescott has a direct and personal involvement, but despite his stay at the 32,000 acre home of an American billionaire, he did not declare his interests to the Commons. Prescott's wheeling and dealing causes further concern that Labour's determination to relax gambling laws is being driven by big business, not the public interest."

God works in a mysterious way, His wonders to perform. So too does big business!

For all those who believe in coincidence: I wonder which seaside resort will be picked on next for some dramatic earth-shattering and derogatory "exposure"? There's quite a few to choose from as you will see if you visit: http://www.britishresorts.co.uk - so what's the likelihood of it being Blackpool yet again? Hmm . . . There's many on that list I'd find fault with before Blackpool, that's for sure! So isn't it strange that I hear about so few of them? I'd better start believing in coincidences, methinks!

When you want to be the Bride and not the Bridesmaid again, sometimes you have to be prepared to leap around a little to catch the bouquet!

See you next week . . .

"The Bitch!" 8/07/06.

About the Author

"The Bitch!", a weekly UK News Review column, is hosted by the author and columnist Michael Knell. These articles appear on the Blackpool Gay Directory website, but are not specifically gay in content. More information on the author: http://www.michaelknell.com and on the directory: http://www.astabgay.com.